Dictionary Of Bar Phrases

1. “YOU GET THIS ONE, NEXT ROUND IS ON ME.”
(We won’t be here long enough to get another round.

2. “I’LL GET THIS ONE, NEXT ONE IS ON YOU.”
(Happy hour is about to end… beers are now a
dollar, but by the next round they’ll be $4.50 a pop.)

3. “HEY, WHERE IS THAT FRIEND OF YOURS?”
(I have no interest in talking to you except as a way
to get your attractive friend into a compromising
position.)

4. “WHAT DO YOU HAVE ON TAP?”
(What’s cheap?)

5. “I’LL HAVE A GLASS OF HOUSE WHITE.”
(FEMALE) (I’m easy.)

6. “I’LL HAVE A GLASS OF HOUSE WHITE.”
(MALE) (I’m gay.)

7. “I’LL HAVE AN AMARETTO & OJ.” (
FEMALE) (I’m really easy.)

8. “I’LL HAVE AN AMARETTO & OJ.”
(MALE) (I’m really gay.)

9. “DO YOU HAVE ANY SAMBUCA?”
(I want to make my friend really sick so we can all
laugh at him in the morning.)

10. “EVER TRY A BODY SHOT?”
(MALE TO FEMALE) (I am even willing to drink tequila
if it means I get to lick you.)

11. “EVER TRY A BODY SHOT?”
(FEMALE TO MALE) (If this is how wild I am in the bar,
can you imagine what I’ll do to you in bed?)

12. “CAN I JUST GET A GLASS OF WATER?”
(FEMALE) (I am really annoying, but cute enough to
get away with this.)

13. “CAN I JUST GET A GLASS OF WATER?”
(MALE) (It’s 6:00 am and I just stopped drinking an
hour ago. Hell, probably spent half my paycheck in
here last night, it is the least you can do for me.)

14. “I DON’T FEEL WELL, LET’S GO HOME.”
(FEMALE) (You’re paying more attention to your friends
than to me.)

15. “I DON’T FEEL WELL, LET’S GO HOME.”
(MALE) (I’m horny.)

16. “WHO’S GOT THE NEXT ROUND?”
(I haven’t bought a round in almost 3 years, but I am
an expert at diverting attention.)

17. “EXCUSE ME.”
(MALE TO MALE)
(Get the hell out of the way.)

18. “EXCUSE ME.”
(MALE TO FEMALE) (I am going to grope you now and
blame it on the crowd.)

19. “EXCUSE ME.”
(FEMALE TO MALE) (Don’t even think about groping me,
just get the hell out of my way.)

20. “EXCUSE ME.”
(FEMALE TO FEMALE) (Move your fat ass. Who do you
think you are anyway? You’re certainly not all that,
missy, coming in here dressed like a ho. And get
your eyes off of my man, or I’ll slap you like the
slut you are, bitch.)

21. “THAT PERSON LOOKS REALLY FAMILIAR.”
(Did I sleep with him/her?)

22. “I DON’T HAVE MY ID ON ME.”
(FEMALE) (I’m 16.)

23. “I DON’T HAVE MY ID ON ME.”
(MALE) (I don’t have a license since I got pulled over
and blew a .4 after my last visit here.)

24. “NO, REALLY, I’M OK TO DRIVE.”
I’m wasted, and I’m too embarrassed to have anybody
see who I’m going home with.)

25. “I’M NOT USED TO THESE DARTS.”
(I can’t throw anything smaller than a pool cue when
I’m this bombed.)

26. “LET’S GO OUT TO MY CAR AND GET SOME CIGARETTES.”
(MALE TO FEMALE) (You would look great face down in my
lap.)

YOU ARE A CHILD OF THE 80’S IF….

You remember “Little Red Corvette”
You know what “Sike” means.
You know the profound meaning of “Wax on, Wax off”.
You know that another name for a keyboard is a “Synthesizer”.
You were only cool if you hung out at the Roller Rink and actually knew how to skate.
You can sing the McDonald’s Big Mack Filet-o-fish, quarter pounder, French Fry song while jump roping.
You wore 3-8 different colored socks in layers and thought that the more
You know who Mr. T is.
You actually believed for a minute that K.I.T. (The night rider) actually was real.
You know who Fat Albert is. ((((( hey hey heyyyyyyy!!!!!!= )))))
You wore fluorescent, neon clothing.
You could break dance, or wish you could.
You wanted to be The Incredible Hulk for Halloween.
You believed that “By the power of Greyskull,
You HAD = the power!”
Partying “like it’s 1999” seemed SO far away.
You thought that Transformers were more than meets the eye.
You wanted to be on Star Search.
You wore a banana clip at some point during your youth.
You remember the garbage pail kids, and owned some.
You HAD to have your MTV.
You always wondered why Tootie always wore those skates.
You actually thought “Dirty Dancing” was a REALLY good movie.
You watched Purple Rain over and over again. Your all time favorite movie was Footloose and
You actually thought that Kevin Bacon was HOT in it!!!
You remember the episode of Good Times when Flo broke down after James’ funeral.
You remember when ATARI was a state of the art video = game system.
You own any cassettes.
You were led to believe that in the year 2000 we’d all be living on the moon.
You remember and/or owned any of the Care Bear Glass collection from Pizza Hut or any other stupid collection they came out with.
Poltergeist freaked You out.
You carried your lunch to school in a Gremlins or an ET lunch box.
You have pondered why Smurfette was the ONLY female smurf.
You know what leg warmers are and probably had a pair.
You wore biker shorts underneath a short skirt and felt stylish.
You had a Swatch Watch with the Swatch Guard.
You thought UTFOs “Roxanne, Roxanne” song was the bomb!
You remember when Saturday Night Live was funny.
You had Wonder Woman or Superman underoos.
You know what a “Push Up” ice cream is.
You had to come in the house when the street lights came on.

If you can identify with at least half of this list then You , my friend, are a “Child of the 80’s”. Send this to anyone that would appreciate going back to this wonderful decade.